Happy Birthday to me!

This is going to be me in another 30 years…

Actually, this old lady looks just like my new neighbour downstairs. Everytime I see her, which is every day because she sits by the window and waves to everyone, I think she is going to ask me for singing lessons and pay me with a handful of meatballs!

If you’ve seen the Wedding Singer film, then you will know exactly what I’m talking about.

Anyways, Genoa has experienced 2 earthquakes this week and I didn’t feel a thing! And tonight everyone is up in arms because it’s supposed to snow I’m of course delighted about this because according to my mom I was born during a blizzard right after she downed a hamburger and fries. Sounds like a fun birthday!

FYI: My birthday is actually January 29th but I like to celebrate my birthday for at least a week

I will also do my annual email to myself at furureme.org. I never remember what I wrote a year ago and get quite a kick from receiving these emails a year later.

And another thing…

To be honest, I’m not sure I even want to write any more about this story because the media is all over it with mis-information. But here it goes anyways…

Costa Cruiselines has kicked the chick out of the nest. In other words, they have enough evidence to release a statement to the media stating that the Captain appears to have made some major errors and did not follow company procedures.

Every night my husband calls me from the ship and I hit him with a barrage of questions. I think in some ways I am in denial that any Captain for that matter could make so many gross errors…so now I guess I am eating my hat because all the fingers point to exactly that! But better still, how did he end up in such a high position in the first place?

What a sad, sad reality. That being said, I want to stop about the Captain once and for all and link you to a short article about a British dancer who assisted guests during the evacuation. I congratulate her for her bravery. Can we please see more of these feel good stories regarding the Costa Concordia?

A matter close to the heart

Tragedy has struck our seas off the coast of Italy as the Costa Concordia sinks. This matter is close to my heart for many reasons. I just returned from two weeks onboard a cruise ship and as most of my readers know, my husband is a Staff Captain. I am also a former crew member and I fear the worst for those who probably perished in the belly of the ship…where most of the crew cabins are located.

When I first started dating my husband he was a Safety Officer. I gained a new respect for his role onboard and took my responsibilities quite seriously when it came time for rescue training and drills. I learned that he could be held personally liable if something went wrong and that not only could it cost him his career and reputation but also his freedom.

I have been reading all the reports on this recent tragedy of the Concordia and as usual the media has been quick to point fingers and find fault with the Captain. I too have been wondering what the heck happened that night. Was the Captain taking unnecessary risks?  Did he wait too long to sound the general alarm? Was there something seriously wrong with the ship and he lost control? Why was the passenger drill scheduled for the next day? Would the passengers have still panicked if they had done the drill earlier?

In time, hopefully all these questions will be answered. But I fear nonetheless. Why? Because not only the Captain was detained by police but also the first officer. If this was my husband’s ship he too would likely be in police custody trying to justify his actions. I’m not saying this is wrong. There is a huge level of responsibility in these positions and they must be held accountable and answer to authorities.

Many have also criticized the crew for being unorganized…I’m sorry, but all of us do drills weekly when the ship is in an upright position! Of course things appeared to be chaotic, just walking in an upright position obviously posed a challenge so how could crew get organized? My guess is they did the best they could.

Personally, even with all my former training, I will never know how I will handle such a situation until I am really in it. Will I panic? Will I keep my wits about me and help others? Will I follow my safety instructions which were assigned to me even though I know my muster station is underwater? What then? What’s the contingency plan?

I know how to launch a life raft, flip it over and collapse the roof for a helicopter rescue. I was an artist on the ship, not a navigational officer. But these were skills I learned in order to feel safe and secure and assist others if such a disaster occurred on my ship.

I pray for those who suffered during this tragic event. I pray for the Captain and hope that the public don’t sentence him without a fair trail. I pray for every crew member and passenger who is aboard a ship right now. Many crew members are young and unfortunately all too often I see the guests lack of respect for their training. If your ship is sinking please, I beg you, if a crew member is trying to help you listen to them!

Grannies, chocolate chips & flannel sheets

It’s my last stop in Charleston, South Carolina before flying back to Italy. Today was a series of frustrating events but I am determined to see the glass as half full and not half empty. After all, I’m a horn tootin’ sailor and I have no choice.

My day started with a 6 a.m. wake-up call. Some nameless crew member ill-informed my husband of the Immigration procedure and told him I had to report to the U.S. Customs officials at 6:30…she was wrong! I then went to the front desk to yell at anyone who would listen…not a good start to the day. Too awake to go back to bed I decided to check my email…and found out my grandmother died yesterday. Sob

I decided although it was freezing cold outside that I needed to get off the ship for some fresh air…but when I got to the gangway they wouldn’t let me off. I had no luggage and this somehow baffled them beyond any common sense. I explained that I would be back later and not to fret but they needed to confirm that I could leave. It still baffles my mind that I can know more about ship’s policies than the security guard, frightening really.

After the news of my grandma, I would hardly say that I was in a charitable mood as I wanted the throttle the idiot who made me wait to get off the ship. Then at Customs the officer wanted to know why I was travelling with a Canadian passport if I lived in Italy and all I’m thinking in the bubble over my head “is the world full off stupid people or is it just me?”. You can’t tell me I am the first person he has ever come across, in his job as a U.S. Customs officer, who lives in one country but was born in another!

Finally off the ship, I met up with my friend Michaela. We ate steaks for lunch and shopped at Walmart. I bought chocolate chips because you can’t buy those in Italy. I bought my best buddy flannel sheets, I bought Jif peanut butter! My grandma was just shy of her 90th birthday. I will miss her. I took her for granted. She had a long, healthy, full life. She had probably done more cruises than me!

I choose to see the glass as half full because I’m a horn tootin’ sailor and my gran would have been happy with that, but can somebody please inject some brains into some of these people here?

Popeye sends his love

Horn tootin’ fun!

For many years now I’ve rung in New Years eve on the bridge of the ship randomly kissing Italian officers at midnight whilst munching on Panatone and sippin’ champagne. I know that probably sounds exciting and well it’s not so bad but I’ve always wanted to be the one to press the ship’s horn at midnight. Usually this is done by the Captain and a bridge officer (there are 2 buttons). Always too shy to ask in past years this year I decided to be brave and speak up.

I simply asked…”hey guys, can I blow the horn at midnight?” And, to my surprise they said “YES!” So as the countdown began the Captain and I stood hovered over the large console with fingers at the ready. As expected some were counting down in English and some in Italian so it was a bit nerve racking to follow but there was no doubt as to when midnight struck. I held down my button and let put a big whoohoo as the horn blasted it’s long deep throated groan to the entire ship. Whatta rush! Can I do this again next year too?

You see, sometimes the simple things in life can be the best. After my horn duty was finished I rushed over to my husband and made sure he got the first New Year kiss then I moved on to kissing the Captain and several other guys with names like Guiseppe, Massimo, Gianpaolo, etc.

I’m optimistic that this is a good sign of a great year ahead. I mean how often can a gal blow her own horn and have an entire ship listen and cheer?

Wishing all my blog buddies and readers and stalkers a very Happy 2012!

PS Even Coco got spoiled with a day trip to Mama’s. Zio Aldo didn’t think it was right to leave her home alone all day on the first day of the new year, Bless him!

Fastweb blues

I know I have been shamelessly ignoring my blog and I simply blame Fastweb! You see I have been in the new apartment for almost a month and I still don’t have high speed Internet service!

Last Thursday the company called me to say a technician was coming, then he quoted my old address! I wanted to leap through the phone and strangle him but lucky for him I am unable to do such tricks…

Nonetheless, after a very convoluted Italian rant in his ear I have heard nothing from the company since. So, at least I can be sure that they know I am pissed off in another language. I will call this a success!

I leave Friday to sail with my husband and have accepted the fact that Fastweb will not make an appearance until January, if at all. And quite franky darling, I don’t give a damn. If they fail to service me I will move on to another company and they will be singing the Fastweb blues all by themselves.

And, just in case I am kinda busy with my hubby…Happy Holidays y’all!

Crap!

Turns out the Internet guy didn’t call back and then Mama yelled at me for not getting out of the tub to continue his phone call. So now I still don’t have high speed Internet. I should have known better to think that the Fastweb dude would call me back. After all, I have been living here for almost five years and I somehow still cling to my Canadian upbringing and truly believe that people will actually do what they say…when will I ever learn?

Am I secretly holding onto some invisible faith that people will do good in this country or am I reluctant to accept reality?

Small Miracles

I got my keys back from Mama! Can you believe it? I didn’t even have to ask for them. It seems that those fancy pieces for the new armadio won’t arrive until the day I am due to leave for the ship. Hence, Mama finally got the message that it could wait until I got back after the holidays…Hallelujah! I think I’ve finally worn her out.

It also seems that I have lost all capacity to say no. Perhaps over the last month saying yes was easier. You see every time I said no I was either asked why not or nobody listened to me anyways so I just surrendered to being a “yes” and now I can’t stop! If you need to borrow money or want me to feed your cat, I’m your gal. But aside from that, work keeps piling in and my schedule has gone from a lazy few lessons a day, to chock full. Isn’t it ironic that when I lived in the city center this never happened?

So now that I have my keys back I wonder how hard it would be to change my phone number? Hehe. Although I’m mostly moved in, there still seems to be continuous visits from this cleaner or that repair guy. I can’t even imagine what my life would have been like if I had bought an old rustico!

I only had one lesson tonight and yet I was up at 7:30 a.m. waiting for some dude to come refinish the bed. Two hours later the apartment reeked of chemicals and in comes Mama and her maid. She insisted that the maid scrub the kitchen floor AND wash the old armadio doors, which are a strange yellow colour and probably shouldn’t be. Again with the chemical warfare. Poor Coco and I were gasping for fresh air on the terrace.

Finally, at 4:00 p.m. the maid took off her rubber gloves and left my toxic apartment. I then went to work with a raging headache. Fast forward to this evening after an ordered pizza I finally settled my tired bones into a hot bath and lo and behold my phone rings. It’s almost 9:00 p.m. and it’s the Internet company…ummm, can you call me back in 20? No sooner do I hang up from this guy and Mama is calling me…I hit the reject button

Now, if that Internet guy would call back I can get on with drying my hair and going to bed already!

Bliss!

I’ve got a bath tub and I haven’t heard from Mama ALL DAY!

Things are definitely looking up

Armadio – Parte Due

“Hey Leah, do you like this lamp? You can have it if you want”

“Ummm, not really.”…the next day the lamp is in my bedroom.

“I think you should get a new cabinet for all your stuff on the terrace”

“Well I agree that this one is a bit rusty but I can paint it. Besides, it’s outside and it’s just to store cleaning products anyways.”…three days later there’s a brand new cabinet on the terrace (and I even bought rust proof paint already, sigh.)

“So, have you picked out an armadio yet or what? You better hurry because I can’t wait forever!”

“Sure, I’ll take that one.”

“Okay. How do you want it inside?”

“Inside? I don’t care. Just deliver it and let me move on with my life.”

“Oh no, you must choose stuff for inside.”

“Okay, put an extra 2 drawers in it”

“Why would you do that?”

“Because I can”

“But that’s not a good idea.”

“Fine, then don’t put anything, I’ll take it like it is”

“Okay, put the extra drawers in then. What else?”

“Ohhhh, how long is this going to take? I’m tired and hungry and I DON’T CARE!”

“But you should put some shelves in”

“Fine.”

“How many do you want?”

“Has anyone got any vodka?”